The Felines Opine About Cat Sitters

tukcrownTucker here. So, the humans went away for a few days to something they called a “wedding”. I have no idea what that is but since I measure all the human activities in light of how it affects me, I was concerned about how the absence of our  servants….errr, beloved humans would affect me.  The humans have always looked out for us when they are not home but still, a cat needs to keep on top of what’s going on.

During the human’s 4-day departure, the rest of The Tribe of Five and I had time to reflect on the subject of cat sitters (why humans call them sitters I will never know, most of them come in, feed us and then leave right away. We rarely see them doing any sitting).  We felt we would do our humans and any future cat sitters a great service by compiling some of our thoughts on this cat sitting business.

 

Dear Cat Sitter,

1212010 003As far as I am concerned, wet food must be provided twice a day according to our daily routine. I have to admit that impatient cat sitters who do not wait for the others to eat their wet food are my favorite people.  I can wander over to all the bowls and finish each dinner before the other felines  have an opportunity to eat. When there is no one to say, “Tucker, NO!” I enjoy quite a repast.

Also something very important to note,  evening treats are NOT an “option”. These treats are part of our routine and something we all look forward to (especially me).

Tucker

 

Dear Cat Sitter,

img_0174Since I’m sequestered in another part of the house due to bullying issues (that cat has since been rehomed but I’m still afraid to roam the house), I live a very quiet existence. For the most part I’m self sufficient but I miss my human’s company at night so I greatly appreciate it if you spend little time with me after the evening feeding. I like to talk to my humans and tell them about all the things I saw outside the big windows in my space. The female human always talks back and even though it sounds like so much cat language gibberish, I like it. If you choose to converse with me, I will not judge you on your feline vocabulary, I’ll just enjoy the fact that you are attempting to communicate with me.  When the humans ask you to turn on the automatic red dot machine, please do this. It provides me with good exercise and brightens my day. (I’d turn it on myself but the lack of opposable thumbs makes this impossible). It also engages Alberto and Oliver who sit outside the door and swat at the dot when it sneaks under the door. Finally, I agree with Tucker, evening treats are definitely NOT optional!
Jasmine

 

Dear Cat Sitter,

cat in windowI am the most skittish one in the Tribe so I don’t bond easily with strange humans. If you spend a little time talking to me, I greatly appreciate it and may even rub your legs or give you a head bonk as a thank you. Also, please pit my wet food dish on a high, safe spot so I can eat in peace without Tucker attempting to move me away from my food. I don’t usually eat immediately  so standing guard for me for a few minutes is also greatly appreciated. . I have no firm stance on the subject of evening  treats but I sure do enjoy eating the cat grass in the kitchen window and appreciate it greatly when the cat sitter waters it. Finally, if you do not see me you may want to check under the coverlet in the guest bedroom or under any of the throws in the house. If you spy a lump, it’s probably me which also brings to mind a caution, please check for lumps before you sit down.
Lily

Dear Cat Sitter,
Siamese Cat Sitting on suitcaseBecause our mother was killed after we were born, my siblings and I were bottle fed and have bonded to humans.  As a matter of fact, we find humans interesting and fun. I never miss the opportunity to make a new human friend so if you would sit on the sofa for a bit I’d love to sit next to you and get some petting.  Since my brother Oliver and I are still young, we love to play. Be careful that you don’t trip on the cat toys I’ve taken out of our toy bin and, if you walk downstairs, I love to run down ahead of you and stop abruptly in front of you, be cautious and alert.  There is  a tantalizing jar of Meowijuana in the pantry that is always a hit with us.  The humans will tell you that Tucker is a “mean drunk” but don’t let deter you from offering us catnip.  As long as you sprinkle the stuff on all the scratching posts we can enjoy it without fighting. (Oh, and don’t forget Jasmine, she loves catnip too!)

Alberto

 

Dear Cat Sitter,

img_2222-1The other four members of The Tribe of Five have covered most of the major points but there is one important thing I’d like to mention. Just because there is kibble in my bowl does NOT mean you should not fill it to the top. Part of my favorite morning routine is doing my “food dance” into the laundry room as you get out the bag of cat food. I will then dance an enthusiastic cha cha down the hallway to the food bowls. I also appreciate a little petting time, because, as Alberto said, we are people lovers. If you stretch out your legs, I will be happy to plant myself on top of them (be sure you have everything you need close by if this happens such as TV remote, your phone, etc. ) as I do not take kindly to being rousted. Things will go much better for you if my departure from your legs or lap is my decision.

Oliver

The Felines Opine On 2016

tukcrownTucker Opines

Well, I must say, 2016 was fairly much like 2015. I retained my lofty position on the red chair in the living room, received treats regularly and even strolled (under human supervision) on the upstairs deck.

The “little guys” as we call them continued to be annoying and always  up to  some kitten shenanigans  but they do recognize my authority as the Alpha of The Tribe of Five and now that they’re just over a year, they are settling down a bit.

And they are making themselves useful. Oliver has decided he likes my prescription food and this is quite convenient for me.. Each morning, when the female human comes out of the bedroom, Oliver races down the hallway and does a little dance by the food bowl. The female human obediently goes to the pantry in the laundry room, grabs the food and fills both of our bowls. Having Oliver around is never having to say, “I’m hungry”.

I’m looking forward to another relaxing year as Alpha as I take up my post on the red chair (or, as the humans refer to it, the “throne”), watch the household antics of Oliver and Alberto, receive my treats and have a perpetually full food bowl.

Jasmine Opines

Siamese cat Jasmine in fake nose and glassesWell, I am still living in the human’s bedroom but things have progressed. If you’re wondering why I live in the bedroom, you can read about it in Amelia’s story.

There have been some breakthroughs in 2016. The humans invite Lily into the bedroom frequently in the evenings and things are progressing enough that  I will actually come out from under the bed when she’s there (although sometimes she forgets she’s supposed to show me deference and chases after me, resulting in a loud a hissy fit and a big “fluffy tail”).. The female human is also leaving the bedroom door open periodically (when she can watch Lily and make sure she doesn’t waltz in.)  I am optimistic about the future.

Siamese cat sitting at a snowy windowThere is much in my two-room environment to keep me interested, the automatic red dot thingy Siamese cat sitting oi chair in front of widow in winterthat twirls and spins and throws red dots down the hallway, huge windows and wide window ledges that look out to the woods around the house.  I often have visitors come by. Some are felines, some are birds, some are squirrels and there is the occasional raccoon as well.

My brother Tucker comes and visits and sleeps overnight, as does Oliver and Alberto.  Tucker sleeps in one of the cushy cat beds but  Alberto and Oliver are a bit disruptive so they end up being escorted out of the room at some time in the wee hours.

The female human showed me that you don’t have to go out to do good work for pets. She and her sister founded a lost pet social media organization for our area and many pets have been reunited with their families thanks to all the good people who help.

All in all, it’s been a good year and much more interesting than last year. The female human told me that when I write my year end comments for 2017, she hopes I’ll be telling you how I roam around the house again.

Lily Opines

cat with New Years hat and glassesIt’s been a good year. I’ve been in the human’s bedroom many times and I’m thinking Jasmine and I may be friends after all (as long as I don’t forget myself and  chase her).

I have a nice routine with the female human. Each evening after she finishes making dinner, she goes downstairs and gets a pail full of cat food. She calls this “junk food” and won’t let us eat it on a regular basis, but she does give Alberto and I a few bits. If Tucker deigns to sashay down the stairs to join us, he gets a few pieces too. She then takes the pail and puts the food down on the patio for our masked friends. One of them comes with her little masked babies and I like to sit by the sliding glass doors and chat with them about woodland life versus indoor life. Seems to me I have the better deal.

The female human’s story “All My Children Wear Fur Coats” was published in February in the newest Chicken Soup for the Cat Lover’s soul book. This experience made her even more interested in writing about and for cats (it’s because of this that she is our purrrrsonal assistant and types for us in this blog). She was even on several radio shows talking about the fabulous Tribe of Five and is now working on something she refers to as a “cozy mystery” that has two cats as main characters (I hope one of them is me).

This month was a bit stressful. Some of the human’s relatives visited, and, although I am sure they are wonderful people, I did not want to be bothered so I spent the time downstairs, burrowed under the sofa cover. The Tribe of Five produced a manual for guests who visit homes with felines, you may want to ensure your humans read this.

It’s been a purrfectly wonderful  year and I look forward to a purrfectly wonderful 2017 as well.

Oliver Opines

Black and white cat with new years mask and hatI would say that I probably had the most exciting year as I threw my hat in the ring as the Kitty Cat Party cat-i-date for purresident. My running mate, Olive, from Three Chatty Cats, and I even sent our human to a conference called Blogpaws with campaign buttons to spread the word about our platform.

Olive and I presented a complete platform only to find that the Today Show featured another feline who was running and never even mentioned my name so I had to take them to task, sheesh, what’s a cat got to do to get some press coverage?

Sadly, my running mate and I did not win but this does black and white kitten runs for presidentnot mean that I have abandoned all my purrlitical aspirations. I have been reading about cats that are mayors, customs officials and even a Chief Mouser for the British Cabinet.  Now that I have some experience, I’m thinking I might just be successful at this purrlitical thing.

No matter what I decide to do in 2017, it will be a great year and I look forward to opining all about it.

Alberto Opines

Siamese cat in bag wearing party hatIt was a great year. I was the official spokes-purrson for the Kitty Cat Pawty campaign and I quite enjoyed all the attention.  Even though my brother Oliver didn’t win, he told me there would be a job for me if he ever entered the purrlitical arena again.

Things in the spring and summer were grand. The humans bought us a portable catio and we all enjoyed
bird and squirrel watching on the front porch and upstairs deck in complete safety. Ever since the female human took a class about the concept of “Fearless” cat raising, she’s made sure our home is as fear free as possible.

The next exciting thing I experienced was being able to Siamese ca walking on leash in the gardenstroll through the front garden with a harness and leash. I quite enjoy myself when the female human takes me out to explore.

I had fun with the male human showing him how to pluck the string things on his guitar, we made some lovely mewsic together

img_2553Fall was a bit dicey. First the humans tried to put some ridiculous thing on me that they called a “dinosaur costume”. I was having none of it and, as you can see by my expression, I conveyed my unhappiness quite clearly.

Then, the female human came out into the living room one night made up like a feline. I was completely gobsmacked (as my British moggie friends would say). At first I was freaked out. Was she going through some strange human to feline transformation? If she was transforming into a cat, who would take over all the things she does for us? (I don’t trust siamese cat and woman with cat ears and cat make-upthe male human to do this). Once I calmed down and figured out she was not cat-morphing I became a bit annoyed. Was she mocking us? It was a terrible “faux paws”  and one, I am fairly certain, the female human will not repeat.

As I lounge by the fire, I am thinking what a happy cat I am and I think 2017 will be even better.

A final note from the #TribeOfFive

Thanks to all our friends out there in the blogosphere. We love the notes we receive from other felines (and other non-feline creatures…and even humans)  and we look forward to entertaining and enlightening you all from our little corner of the world in 2017.

Purrs & Meows,
Tucker, Jasmine, Lily, Alberto & Oliver

 

 

 

 

 

So, You’re Visiting Our Humans…

allguestsapproved

Tucker Opines

cross eyed Siamese catTucker here. The home of the Tribe of Five has been the destination for a number of visitors this year. We normally live a fairly quiet life, doing what we want, when we want, pretty much where we want. The arrival of human visitors always puts a bit of a crimp in our lifestyle.

There are a number of pre-guest things that happen in our house that we felines find objectionable. There is the copious use of the vacuum monster, the aggressive mop and the fact that some spaces, normally available to us are suddenly restricted.

The female human is a bit obsessive about cleaning  and boy does she ramp up when people are coming to stay at our house. There’s a lot of toothbrush around the moldings, edges of the shower, etc. Really, in all my thirteen  years, I have never seen a visiting human bend down to inspect the moldings in our house. I think the female human needs to chill.

This flurry of activity is the first indication that guests will be arriving.  And then comes phase two, the guests arrive!

Each member of the Tribe of Five have certain requests of any interlopers….errr…guests that come to our home.

First, please remember that there are specific areas we have designated as our own personal rest spots. For me, it’s on top of the down cushion on the big red chair. When  sitting in my chair, please do not lean too hard against the cushion in order not to disturb me.

You may want to bring your own personal sticky, roller thing. Although the female human has many around the house…in a house of five felines cat hair is the gift that keeps on giving.

Please be respectful of our schedule. The male human prepares our wet food dinner at approximately 4:00pm each day. If you have plans for the humans, I ask that you honor our dinner schedule. What you do after that is of no consequence to us.

Alberto Opines

Siamese Cat Sitting on suitcaseAlberto here. The humans have this wonderful room with a big, comfy bed, lots of soft quilts and a perfect view of the trees,  waterfall and forest below. This is one of my favorite nap places. When you arrive, the humans will escort you to this room, and then tell you that it is perfectly fine for you to keep the door closed. Do not believe them. It is not perfectly fine; it is in fact, quite rude in my estimation.

How am I supposed to get a nap when you shut my only access to this wonderful place? You visiting humans bring interesting smells on your shoes and luggage and we felines need a chance to come in and do a thorough sniffing observation. How can we know where you’ve been and what animals you have petted when you deny us access to this room?

When you sleep, it is particularly nice for us to be able to come in and walk across your face and sit on your chest so please, when our humans say, “You’ll probably want to keep the bedroom door closed” accept this for the lie that it is.

Oliver Opines

black and white cat with a heart over his eyeOliver here. When Alberto and I were first brought to our home as fosters, we were very tiny and the humans used the large guest bathroom as our nursery.  This is why I have a purrrticular fondness for this room.

In addition, the female human has the room decorated in black and white and I feel that it shows off my own beautiful coloring to it’s best advantage (and, if I sit very still, it works as fairly good camouflage).

One of my favorite games is “sneak in the bathroom, hide in the shower and then jump out” when the guest humans are sitting on the white, throne thing. I derive great delight in this although I must confess, some of the guest humans let out little scream sounds and act like they’re upset. Really, have you seen me? I’m a cute little guy with a black heart over my eye, how scary can I be?

The humans will use the same line regarding the guest bathroom door as they do with the guest bedroom door, giving guest humans full purrrmission to lock us out. Do not believe their lies. And for those guest humans who do choose to keep the door closed. Alberto and I will position ourselves in front of it and wait for you to come out so we can rush in.

Lily Opines

cat in windowLily here. I am extremely shy and human guests send me into a state of absolute terror. If you want to start out on the right paw with me, I BEG you, do NOT ring the doorbell! A soft knock on the door freaks me out as it is, but the horrible door bell will send me down the stairs in a panic and you may never see me again during your stay.

Because I am a scaredy-cat and none too sociable, I will probably remain downstairs during the length of your stay. If you insist on coming downstairs into my territory, I ask you to be extremely careful before you sit on the sofa.  That lump you see under the couch cover is probably me.

If you go into the female human’s office downstairs, please observe the rules. It is expected that I will accompany you but none of the other felines are allowed. This is a contract I have had with the human for quite a while. It works well for us and I expect you to honor it.

Some of us are referred to as “darters” and when the humans tell you to make sure we don’t get out, they are very serious. We live in a woodsy area and there are a number of woodland creatures who show up and stare into the downstairs sliders.  The upstairs deck is not so safe either. Tucker has fallen off the balcony twice into the ravine and Oliver launched himself downstairs when he was just a kitten. If you want our company outside, the humans will show you where they keep the pop up tent catio that allows us to be outside and stay safe.

If you are going to sit on a stool at the counter, you may not want to leave any meat items you are eating unattended. This goes for glasses of water as well. We probably won’t drink it but there’s a good chance it will end up on the floor.

Finally, when the female human does her nightly feeding of the mama raccoon, house rules state that I am to have a little of the cat food she gives them. It’s our little ritual.

That about covers it but remember, you may go your entire stay without ever meeting me.

Jasmine Opines

Siamese cat on fur throwI am the “invisible” feline, Tucker’s 13-year old sister who was bullied severely and now lives in the human’s bedroom . The female human wrote about this.  I am happy to say, things are progressing. Since the kittens Alberto and Oliver came to live with us, they visit me regularly. Lily comes in for a while every evening and the female human takes me for regular visits to the rest of the house. She says that one of her happiest days will be when the bedroom door is open and I roam the house again.

My tips are simple, please don’t ask to meet me, it might freak me out. Please don’t keep my humans up too late as bedtime is “me” time with my humans.

I am the least affected by company but I do know how much the humans enjoy those who come to visit so I say, come and visit, enjoy the view from the guest room and be sure and bring light colors and clothes that cat hair won’t cling to. And for heaven’s sake, leave your canines at home!

P.S. Don’t forget to check your luggage before you leave, Alberto is fast, sneaky and loves to hide in suitcases.