Oliver here. Since I am still technically a kitten, there is much I have yet to experience and many questions I have to ask about the world around me.
I have been hearing the humans speak a lot about this thing called “politics” and something called “the Presidential election”. My humans have told me they are conservative, free market, state sovereignty, transparent government loving folks so if my comments lean a bit to the right, you’ll know where I got my ideas. .
I thought I would obtain some information from the older felines in the house so I went to Tucker and his sister Jasmine. Both are twelve years old and have a few of these “Presidential elections” under their belts.
Unfortunately neither of them wanted to talk politics although I did get Tucker to say that if a candidate would guarantee a catio on every front porch, a home and food for every feral cat and a bird feeder in front of every window (kitty cable) he would definitely consider voting for that candidate.
Jasmine had no thoughts on the matter, turned her back to me, raised her tail and sashayed off.
Lily is three and has had no experience in these matters.
This left me to my own devices
(my brother Alberto is too young and he’s a silly goofball who never sits still enough to discuss anything seriously). I purrrrused the internet and I found a strange phenomenon of humans dressing their cats to resemble one candidate in purrrrticular. Although amusing, this did nothing to further my political education.
And then, lo and behold, I found a CAT who is running for president. Now before I announce this furry cat-i-date’s name, I would like to go on record as saying that his name might be a bit of a marketing issue.
His name is Limberbutt McCubbins, the feline Democratic candidate for President. When my humans saw me reading up on a Democratic candidate, they almost had a hissy fit but then they decided I should make up my own mind about my political leanings. I read this cat-i-dates stand on the issues and there were a few I was able to gave an enthusiastic paws up.
Cat-i-date Limberbutt’s passion for homeless cats is honorable and worthy of support. All the felines in my family were rescues and we appreciate anyone who wants to help cats have homes.
McCubbins states he has a kind heart, although I am wondering if his kind heart and compassion extend to all creatures (would he kill a helpless mouse, bird, gecko, etc. if he had the chance) or does his tolerance and compassion only extend only to certain species and breeds?
He believes in a tax code that is just for all. I would have to agree, after all, the less taxes the humans pay, the more money they have to spoil us with. I would like to know more about his concept of fair taxes. Does he want to take kibble and treats from some cats he decides have too much and give it to other cats he thinks don’t have enough? I might have a problem with that.
I can agree with cat-i-date LImberbutt’s desire for affordable veterinary care for all felines but before I jump on his bandwagon I’d like to know how he intends to make that happen. There seems to be a distinct lack of specific plans here and even though I’m only a kitten I know that most humans have a limited amount of money to support us in the manner to which we are accustomed.
The last portion of his platform has me a bit nervous. Limberbutt is a staunch supporter of space exploration and believes we should see a return to cat space flights. Now if he wants to send humans into space, they can go all they want. Sending cats into space? Not on your life. Who would he choose to shoot into the outer limits…felines that didn’t agree with him or felines whose pawlitical stands he doesn’t like? Nope, not supporting that.
I guess I understand why all the humans are in such a tiz about this political stuff. There sure is a lot to think about.
Maybe we should all (humans and felines) focus on what we can agree on and instead of hissing and spitting at each other, just have a sociable nose sniff and a little back and forth meowing. Or, maybe I should throw my hat into the ring….how does “Oliver Twist Aurit” for President sound?