Oliver Opines About Legal Stuff

Hello Furiends,
Oliver here. Many of you may have noticed that Alberto’s “Walk Through The Web Wednesday” feature was not posted last week. There was no post, no explanation, and no mea culpa from our Purrsonal Assistant.

In light of these distressing circumstances, my legal services were called upon. Alberto (who is also my firms Purralegal ) brought his case to my office.

Alberto, Purralegal at Oliver & Associates, Feline Law

It appears that a gross violation of the contract between Feline Opines and it’s lackey…er…Purrsonal Assistant has occurred.

The Purrsonal Assistant has been tasked with ensuring our words and thoughts are presented on a regular basis on this blog as well as providing some other ancillary duties as dictated…err..requested by the feline members of this blog.

We live in Idaho which is a “work at will” state, the legal definition of “work at will” is ,””there is no set length for an employment relationship and either the employer or the employee may end it at any time, with or without notice; with or without cause.” At first blush the egregious lack of follow through by our Purrsonal Assistant would require immediate dismissal. However, being the cautious and thorough attorney I am, I did suggest to my clients (Alberto and Lily) that they carefully consider the repercussions of such an action.

Lily, being more reflective and cautious than Alberto, went for a stroll in the garden outside my office to ponder the advice I’d given. She came back with some thoughtful and important questions that Alberto had failed to ask.

She first asked about the definition of “ancillary”. I responded, “It is providing necessary support to the primary activities or operation of an organization, institution, industry, or system.”

When she asked what some of those services might be I noted, feeding, brushing, treats, petting, etc..

The next thing she said was, “What in the world was Alberto thinking?!” She marched back into the office and chastised Alberto for shoddy purralegal work, reminding him that if they proceeded in this legal action and fired the Purrsonal Assistant, they would be missing a lot more than blog posts.

The conversation turned into a hissing match and I decided to retire to my office until some conclusion (and semblance of peace) had been reached. Volatile meetings are a recurring problem when you handle feline legal matters.

When Alberto and Lily calmed down, I suggested we convene again.

The culmination of our meeting was that Alberto would take the threat of firing the Purrsonal Assistant off the table as long as she signed a pledge to be more conscientious in her blog duties and immediately place an order with Chewy for a case of their favorite treats.

All in all, I must say that I’m quite proud of my legal guidance and would like to announce that my office is open for any and all feline clients who wish to seek my advice.

P.S. As a result of the recent legal settlement, Alberto’s regular “Walk Through The Web Wednesday” feature will appear this week.

20 thoughts on “Oliver Opines About Legal Stuff

  1. We had a pretty bad week here too with losing our sister Zoe so we wouldn’t have had time to read either. We’ll be looking forward to the next one though.

    Like

    • Brian,
      My heart is breaking for you. So many fur kid losses in the last few months. There are no words sufficient to offer comfort but there is a lovely Swedish saying, “”Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow.” It is my prayer that those of us who share your sorrow can alleviate a bit of it for you. I’m praying for your hurting hearts and envisioning Zoe and my Jasmine and Tucker, playing together.
      Anita

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Walk Through The Web Wednesday 6/24 | Feline Opines

  3. That is the exact reason my felines do not fire me, even though i am so far behind in blogs (thanks to vacation that turned into some work, several 11 hour work days, and two tornadoes, among other problems) that if i am required to read them all while i am on this earth, i will probably never die.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Pawsome job, Oliver! Do you have any advice for our human. She’s taken a second job and is seriously behind in cuddles and naps. We feel we should be higher on the priority list. Purrs, Snoops and Kommando Kitty

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Snoops and Kommando Kitty,
      I had my purralegal do some checking in the “Unwritten Code of Cat Rights” and it appears that in Part D, section 3 it states, “Humans are to ensure that felines are top priority. For instance, if a feline is reclining on said human’s lap, human shall resist from getting up, moving or making any type of movement that would disturb the feline. All aspects of life shall take a back seat to the feeding, petting and general welfare of the feline.

      I would suggest you print this out and present it to your human advising that you have sought legal counsel.
      Purrs & Head Bonks,
      Oliver & Associates, Expurrts in Feline Law

      Liked by 1 person

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